When I was 18 years old, my dad died suddenly from a stroke. When I turned 36, I remember so vividly thinking that now I had lived half of my life without him. As time goes on, I live more and more of my life without him. With Natalie, it is ever so painful because she was here for such a short time, just 19 months and 18 days. Once again, I feel scared at the thought of time moving forward, even though I know it will and there's nothing anyone can do about it. Maybe I’m scared that her memory will fade and it will be like she was never here? I wonder if I’m making it worse for myself by making a big deal out of this marker of time. One could say that it’s just a day like any other day. But I don’t believe that’s true. Some days do have more meaning and significance.
We have a busy day ahead of us tomorrow, but we will be lighting 19 candles in memory of our sweet little angel, this exceptionally adorable and special little person who was here, if only for a little while. I pray that her memory will not fade.
1 comment:
It is so important for you to mark the important dates and equinox sounds perfect! She will never be forgotten and watching Ros grow and blossom is a gift to her. We will light a candle for her today.
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